Hi fellow perfectly imperfect beings! It’s been a LONG time since I’ve written here, and I’ve missed it so much. As you can imagine, being a senior in college was an all-consuming task. Whether I was busy trying to get through all my classes, fighting the severe burn-out, managing all my extracurriculars, or just soaking up every last minute with my friends – I was so occupied trying to just make it to the finish line in one piece. And, well… I DID IT! I finally graduated with my Bachelor’s degree in Psychology with a minor in Art Studio this past May!

SO! What have I done since then? After graduating, moving out, and bidding farewell to little ‘ole South Hadley, Massachusetts – I went home and just rested for four long months. I took that time to do all the things I loved with the people I loved. I got into new hobbies and re-visited old ones. I took a little trip to London in August to see Taylor Swift in the Eras Tour one last time, and eventually I ventured out here to Chicagoland to start my long anticipated Master’s degree. It’s officially been a little over a month since I started this program here at Northwestern University, and boy do I have so many thoughts to tell you!!

To start off, moving here was definitely an interesting journey and navigating housing was not for the faint of heart. However, I eventually found a place which I love more and more everyday! It’s so interesting seeing how quickly I’ve adjusted to this place and feeling more at home with every week that passes by. I’ve fallen in love with Evanston so quickly and it’s been such a profound move. There’s something so special about finding yourself in a new place and atmosphere. Just when you think you know yourself so well, you discover more about yourself. It’s so odd because while I miss my college friends and MHC very dearly, this is the first time since being in the U.S. that I’ve felt at peace and felt like I’m where I was meant to be. Growing up fantasizing about living in the U.S., this is exactly what I imagined for myself. Don’t get me wrong, college was everything I wanted and more – but I finally feel like my mental state is in tune with the state of my life. Not sure if that makes sense, but everything feels right.

As for the program, let’s talk about it! Entering this post-graduate phase of my life was nothing short of nerve-wracking. As soon as we hit august and the outreach from the program begun, my anxiety was through the roof. I was nervous about anything and everything. The impostor syndrome was having a field day with my mind and I just had to accept it. Eventually we made it here, physically, and I blinked and we’re already more than halfway through the first quarter. I’ve done a lot of reflecting since being here on whether or not this program is what I wanted it to be – and to put it simply, it is.

I wasn’t entirely sure what I was expecting from this program coming into it, but I knew there were certain aspects that I wanted from a graduate program. Some of those were: gaining clinical experience, learning more about the field of counseling and being well-prepared to enter it, and ultimately having my education finally tailored to my specific interests in the therapeutic aspect of the field. While I loved learning all about psychology during undergrad, my interests always lied in the clinical and the therapeutic side of it. Just within this very first quarter, I see myself really captivated by the content of our classes and the practicum component. I haven’t felt this way about a class in so long, which I hate to admit, but truly the last time I was THIS engaged with my courses was when I first took developmental psychopathology and regular psychopathology in undergrad. It’s not as though I wasn’t interested in my classes, I just haven’t been this excited by the content and the assignments since then. I remember when I first graduated and I was talking to people about how burnt out or nervous I was about starting my masters degree – they would always say you’re going to love it! Well, I’m so glad they were right!

It’s been a long time since my current standing in life felt aligned with my interests and yearnings. You know when you’re in a moment and you’re trying to soaking it all in because you’re aware you’ll be missing it soon? This is exactly how I feel nowadays. I walk around just taking it all in. I sit in class and time just passes me by. I’m engaged, I’m present, and I’m learning new things every hour I’m awake – whether it be academic or life lessons. I’ve romanticized my life in a way that makes everyday enjoyable – even when it feels like I’m drowning in work, tired, exhausted, constantly having a running to do list, etc. And to add the cherry on top, learning has become fun again, and I love going to class on Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

Prior to applying, a lot of people told me getting your master’s wasn’t worth it, because why pay crazy expensive tuition when you can get a higher degree (PhD) and get paid for it? And while I do recognize the financial barrier that master’s degrees present with – which is so disheartening for all those who would love to continue their education – if you’re considering graduate school and are in a position where it is possible, I say DO IT! While a PhD is spectacular and a true badge of honor, being only 22 with a lot of life to live still, committing to seven years right after graduating seemed to big of a commitment for me. I consider myself a life-long learner, and while I hope to get my doctorate degree one day, getting to expand on my knowledge and practice in a way that’s catered to my interests and doesn’t require years of commitment – is such a privilege. I’m happy I’m here and getting to see myself evolve in real time. Yeah moving away, once again, and leaving everything and everyone I loved behind was awfully hard, but I’m proud of myself for doing it. I, personally, needed to branch out on my own and get out of my comfort zone to be able to make this degree happen. While it’s only been 6 weeks since we’ve started, I just know this is going to be a challenging yet profound two years of my life ❤

If this resonated with you in any way, take this as sign that it is possible and worthwhile. You got this and I believe in you!

xoxo,

Danyah